Monday, January 16, 2006

Home, underrated

As it looks more and more like I may actually be moving (I'm hoping to jinx it by writing it in ink--or pixel), I keep thinking how very underrated staying in the land of your birth is. Since I was seven, my parents made it clear to us that had the economy been different, we would have been raised in NYC. Every slight made against me or the twins would cause my mom to rail against this backwards town. And it's true. Everytime the legislature convenes I say to myself, "we're out of here." But I do think that the imperative to leave can be a overrated. The opinion that to be truly career-oriented and grow- up requires that one leave town. And, I subscribed to that when I lived in Portland. But I also think appreciating what is here becomes evident only as the moving threatens. It's important to me that Zoe grow up around people who think she's truly unique, not just another baby; that Erik and I can go to dinner at the drop of a hat because her grandparents will come over at a moments notice; that her cousins are close enough to be like siblings; that when she looks outside she sees amazing land.
But there are enough drawbacks--bad legislature, bad restaurants, bad smog, bad legislature, the bad house being built next door destroying part of the amazing land, bad jobs--that we should at least seriously entertain the notion of going.
I can come back for summers, I'm reminded.
Zoe can visit her grandparents for weeks at a time, I'm told.
But having left home and come back, I feel like I know exactly how much I'll be missing--


Trista said...

I know what you mean. Utah is a land of extremes. Things that are extrememly bad are balanced by things that are extrememly good. And my whole family is here as well. Kristin and I are planning on leaving in 2.5 years (when she finishes her master's program) so that I can go to school and we can adopt our children, but it is going to be so hard to leave the many, many good things here -- family, friends, amazing landscapes.

Oh and congratulations on both the initial interviews and the second ones!

Nik said...

Thanks, Trista. I know. Well, since our families are here, at least we'll always come back. But I feel if I could commit to staying, I could make some kind of difference (like Ralph Becker or Rocky or Paula Joulander). But the PAIN of futility.
Ah, then I think of all the people I know here who are as liberal or more as the folks I knew in Portland. As long as I'm surrounded by good folks....who, I assume, are everywhere.
It's good to hear from you. It's been crazy with the job biz. It will be over, one way or another, soon.

Dr. Write said...

I don't need to say it again, or maybe I do, good luck!
But I was just saying to Middlebrow that I have a hard time imagining you leaving SLC. I think of SLC, I think of Nik. But maybe that says more about me than you. I've never lived here without you. How will I survive? You must send back illegal wine shipments or something.
Good luck to ya!